Road Trip to Pennsylvania in one week.
Wooooo. I need to get out of this house.
Im tired of the TV always being so loud here.
Having to tell my parents something 18 times before they finally hear me. Then they ask why im yelling. cause i just had to tell you something 18 times!!!
Tired of getting no respect around here.
My friends recently pointed out how shitty my whole family's attitude is towards.
Its really bothering me. I think i need out. Away.
If i come back im coming back to hardly any friends. My core Group has moved out there.
Hanging everyday would be cut to just a few times a week.
Sucks. Ted is only around so much. Ian is down once a week about.
Thats it! Could get a job and have co worker friends, But i fuckin hate coworkers.
Those arent real friends no matter how long you kick it with em.
So Fuck. I might as well stay in Pennsylvania when i go out there.
Hello, Hello, You lonely, Lonely, Completely forgotten about blog!
How in the Hell are you?
I see Absolutely Nothing has changed. Thats good to know.
Here too. Here too.
So.......
(Weird Silence)
ummmm......
So My Bestfriend right now is a girl. A girl I Love, But only as far as a sister, or cousin.
I think im her bestfriend too, But wouldnt complain if i came up third or fourth removed.
Chillin with her and her company is pretty much a sum up of most my active days.
Her boyfriend isnt the brightest bulb on the billboard,
But has good potential to make her happy. So thats cool.
What he lacks in personality, his dog makes up for. (Guinness owns!)
She has quickly, in my mind,
made all my dude friends seem diluted, and highly tamed.
Our conversations are intriguing and usually hilarious.
She has shown me more insight into the female brain than any other female ever.
Rightfully so, I am kind of terrified of her.
I wouldn't think to ever lie to her,
or double cross her in anyway, in fear of evisceration.
If my life was an Autobiographical open book,
she would definitely be my proofreader.
Having a female bestfriend at times makes me feel a little effeminate,
But im Pretty secure with who i am for the most part.
Most of its just subtle mockery anyways. Its all about fun.
I dont view her as anything else but an equal.
I think She knows what shes doing in life,
and that shes smart and beautiful.
Im not Secretly in Love with her, or lusting after her.
Thats would be sad and a lil gross! I love her, But nah. Not like that.
As Matter of fact Her boyfriends drunk on ramblings with the guys,
about sex with her,
kinda almost makes me gag sometimes.
Its a True Friendship, i feel.
Its Not easy labeling someone as a bestfriend.
especially after having a bestfriend vacancy for a while,
So im just adjusting. Thus writing a whole blog about her.
Shes not a brand new friend, Shes been around,
I just have more confidence now in our communication abilities.
Its really kinda neat, and confusing, and I think shes just as horrible as me sometimes.
Its all kindsa trippy.
My best friend is a Girl,
Who is a girl and a Friend,
But not, and never, A girlfriend.
Just a Best Friend.
Thats gonna be hard to explain to girlfriends.
Plus she goes by the nickname Charlie,
So, Future Scenario,
"oh yeah my bestbud Charlie is coming to dinner"
and in walks a blonde female.....
Thatll be fun.
Eugen Bleuler, who named schizophrenia, held that its defining characteristic was a disorder of the thinking process.
Would you call a disorder of a thinking process, an odd thought process?
Do i have thought disorder?
How come whenever i read something about schizophrenia I can check off some symptoms of the lesser known forms?
Im not schizophrenic in any way of the classic meaning, at all. Yet.
I dont think i head voices. Cant be sure though. I mean,
Is it me making random stuff up, Or is it an underlying disorder I havent come to terms with?
My Blogs are kinda depressing with all the brainless Whooplah i write.
It doesnt feel like the part of my brain typing to you now,
Is the one that does the mindless freakzoid type-y thing.
On top of these self doubts and whatnot, i got family stuff going on,
With some other relationship nonsence finally ending,
And im starting to feel the pressure of life.
I dont know what to do.
The Universe is only drifting me so far,
I need to figure out who the fuck i am.
I have No clue.
I dont know where i want to be.
What i want to do.
I just wish there was a plan.
I have nothing.
Not One damn thing.
No light in my tunnel.
I dont even know if im in a tunnel?
What if im in a basement, or a really dark attic?
A Void of all Consciousness?
Crap. Its bed Time.
Depression feels like an old friend finally came home.
I hate to say it, but it feels okay.
What what what up?!!!
Chillin here.
Been a Pizza/Pasta cook at Jerry's in the mall.
Oi oi! I gotta work my first friday night....
Woooooooooo! not.
We'll see how that goes.
Sunday was pretty nutty.
I know why people dont get there food served on time now.
Cause you all order too much at the same time.
Take time to relax in a restaurant. Order when no one else is.
I cant handle full plates of food much anymore.
I rather snack now. Or actually cook something to eat.
Far out really.
But i guess when i was a bartender, i did take up a drinking habit.
Made the job a breeze.
Order a Deli pizza.
The pastrami at Jerry's is bomb.
The line chefs always give you more pastrami than you need for a pizza.
Profit? This Guy typing. Wordo!
What else......
This money stuff is cool. Its funny how you learn to be broke, Then like a snap, you get used to having money. The thing killing me right now is its slow money. Bartending is Frikkin Amazing. Pay day everyday. And then you get a check once in a while and your like, Oh yeah, I do get paid for this job, huh?
Stew it. Into stew. Into Stew. You. Into Stew.
Everything. Into stew. Stew it. Me? In the Stew.
Oh Stew it. Into stew. Into stew. Me,you. In the Stew.
As we sit here, Slowly stewing, Can i ask you to pass the carrots.....
Yeah..........
Being Alone Vs. Feeling Alone Winner: Being Alone.
Being is such a funky word! To be. Simple and rather nice in some sense.
Your Being, by just being. Without even trying you just be!
Perfect, Easy, Awesome. Alone Or not, you are being.
You don't Have to be alone at all. you can call a friend.
or Pull some teeth and kick it with a parental unit.
You are Never alone at a mall or Movie theater.
unless the Movie sucks
or you happen to be night time security.
Being isn't bad at all,
and Being Alone, is cured as fast as finding the next closest being.
You can be together. Two beings, Just being, to be. Coolness.
Now Feeling alone is a Whole other trip! And A real Trip it be!
In some experiences, i haven't even been alone.
You can be with anyone, doing anything,
and get a basically hollow shiver of feelings.
Couldn't explain the mind numbing dropping feeling if i tried.
Something just kicks you in the head kinda killing half of you for a second.
It feels like the dark side to anxiety almost.
I've found it now, in my 23rd year of life, easy to shake feeling alone.
I Kind of stuff it into a Black void of nothingness.
Amputating That alone feeling. Losing it. Temporarily of coarse.
Till the Next random Spell hits,
and needs to be taken out like trash.
Into the Void.
Feeling alone probably isn't healthy.
I have a feeling neither is the way i dispose of it.
I'm guessing that explains my slight emotional detachment from certain things.
Or why tender scenes in movies tear me eyes. (its true. tear me eyes, arrrrr.)
Thats Why Being Alone is the Winner.
The Title of this Blog is taken from a Quote In the Movie: Airheads
Staring Adam Sandler, Steve Buscemi, Brendan Fraser, Joe Mantegna, Chris Farley, WHITE ZOMBIE.
Good Movie! One of My Favorites. Doesnt Make me Tear up. Awesome!
I used to think writing down my feelings helped somewhat.
As of recently, i feel its the writing that helps. Not so much the content.
Blah bloooooo oBlable Skittle Flavored Fries.
Doesnt mean anything to the reader,
But if it got my frustrations out,
To hell with what you read.
I stole this, cause it Got me.......
-Hundreds of years ago the world KNEW that the earth was flat, everyone on earth knew that the earth was the center of the universe, and in parts of China, it is still taught that China is the center of the universe. Today we are taught in schools that the sun is the center of the universe, but the truth is that the sun is NOT the center of the universe. The sun is the center of our solar system, but it is NOT the center of the Universe. In 1961, Paul Otto Hesse discovered that there were 7 more solar systems in our universe (our universe is called the Pleiades). Our solar system orbits the farthest out from the center of our universe. The Alcyone system is the center of our universe. To avoid being narrow minded, I would have to state that there may be more than one universe, but that is speculation at this time (there could actually be a "multiverse").
In about the year 2012 our solar system will pass through what is called the Photon Belt. It contains Photon energy, and it will take nearly 2000 years for the earth to pass thru it. Most people have never heard of the Photon Belt, but they have heard of Heaven. Heaven as described by the Bible (not by modern churches) is the Photon Belt. When you read about the coming "Kingdom of Heaven" in the Bible in Revelation, you will see that the "Kingdom of Heaven" is physically coming to earth. The truth is that our solar system is orbiting towards the "Kingdom of Heaven." The Photon Energy emits light all day long, so there will be no darkness in the Photon Belt as we will be surrounded by Photon Energy. The Bible talks about a time when heaven will arrive on earth and there will be no more darkness. This will happen because of the light that the Photon Energy emits, but it will not happen until after we pass through about 3 days of total darkness. -
The whole Three days of darkness it mentions is Interesting.
What side of the earth will be dark?
Cant possibly be the entire Earth. Thats rediculon 500.
Why would photon energy black out the sun?
and 2000 years of no Darkness?
Thats not gonna sit right with my pasty complexion.
2012 NO MATTER WHAT,
Is going to be an interesting year i think.
Even if shit does go Y2k,
Like absolutely nothing Nothing Nothing happens.
But anyways, the Three days of Darkness was interesting to me because
I read About it in the Ancient Secret of the flower of life.
Three days of darkness comes up in the transference into the fourth dimension.
And Shift of Ages-wise theres mention of a three day halt to earths rotation.
If Chance Dimensional Crossover was to come though,
Its in my Personal belief through personal research,
It would happen more around February 2013.
Just that 3rd Native American blood speaking.
Its late so i wont get Started on Internet Neutrality.
Next time more.
Lates On Gator.
I dont know much about deep thought, no.
I dont know much about how the world goes round
I dont know how much there is all out there to know
I just dont know
dont know
dont know
Not really one for knowing which direction to head
Or knowing where the best munchies with a dollar to spend
I dont think i know any information you need
I can find pot, but dont know about coke, X or speed
I dont know much about who you are or what your feeling
dont know much about myself here either though, if you get me.
Dont know much about my best friends, a rasta Mon and a Hippie
Dont know shit about religion, but its all only a theory
I just Dont know about finding a stable job with good checks,
or how to express the way i really feel with the opposite sex
I Cant seem to know everything, although i try my best
I do know though that in this world you Do Know what "They" expect.
Hello Vox.
My forgotten friend of blogs you!
How are You?!
Its Been Too Long! Like Revenge of the Sith, to A New hope.
Thats like, Ages!
So basically i told Myspace, as well as Paper and pens to bugger off.
Im done with Surveys, and writing my feelings on paper.
I'm Getting nothing outta writing lately, cant feel it anymore.
So Screw it. Im a go back to clackin bass and drawing slugs more.
Myspace is scary. I feel i have stalkers.
I think people think they know me exclusively by who i am on myspace.
Which is hilarious if factoid. Just had some crazy Deja Vu.... nutty!
So i guess that just leaves you, right?
Your not a myspace blog or a piece of paper.
Kinda feel bad for leaving you here all by your lonesome for a couple months.
That'll change though.
your not mad at me are you?
I thought Not. Cause its all Good.
I feel a little more room for depth, or shallowness, or wideness of typing funky words here.
No eyebrow raising, and talking about it in person, like "WTF was that?"
I Dont want to explain myself in person for something i wrote online.
Im not completely sure who i am online. a 21st Century Trash talking, Music Pirating, Stoner Guy?
I dont keep track of what i say. But some of the people that i know that view my page, do keep track.
Scary, and kinda really messed up!
Thats why im glad No one knows i have this blog.
Besides the Awesomely Most Fabulous Righteously Gorgeous Lass In all the Land!
Big Shout out to Lauren Love!!
But Shes My Ace. I love Lauren.
I dont Love The Myspace friends that Stalk and think they get my perception of reality.
Those people never wanna hang out..... Why?
Theres No Room For Stalkers here!
They must be Kettle Fried in salt butter, and just a little sugar.
Okay, a lot of sugar.
I wish i had kettle corn......
Those super crystallized ones, that explode with sugar fun land happiness!!
Damn.
Night Vox!
Clacks at ya some more soon.
What in the Fuck is Happening to my friends?
Josh just got Married,
Ian Has become some kind of Rastafari Hippie Hybrid,
And topping off this cake,
Bruce has Found God?!?!?!
He was fucking preaching about some shit tonight
about how he found the light.
Somehow he thinks I'm in between going negative and going positive.
Fuck That! I'm a Libra, i naturally maintain balance.
I'll be in the exact same place, when your feeling all negative and shit.
And how is he discovering all these messages?
Through listening to music, and talking to god.
He Told me he felt like some prophet or something because his "antenna"
Are picking up messages and signs from God.
I dont buy it.
I think bruce has snapped.
i dont get it.
What drives a man to this point?
Stress might be a trigger,
Homeboy has been stressed for too long!
Nil hours of sleep maybe?
Homie sounded like a tweeker man!
WTF?!?!
Inspiration, my lady,
all starts with yourself,
Turning all that is silent
to musical bliss,
its Something i crave for
its something we create
Without you theres nothing
Such a feeling of waste
Dont understand it.
never will
its just has to be something you put in the air.
Something so rhythmic
melodically rude,
something so corrupt,
yet a spirit thats true
.
Cant go on, no
cant go on without
Cant go on,
icant go on without you,
without you
cant go on,
without you......
Our soul is connected
our past is the same
both paths interwoven
identical hearts to be tamed
No words can separate us
Nothing can break this bond
Confided in each other
our Passion is Strong.
Dont understand it
Never will.
it just has to be something you put in the air.
That rhythmic entrancement,
So Melodically crude ,
sometimes hypnotizing,
The feeling,
so True
Cant go on, no
cant go on with out
Cant go on,no
cant go on without you,
without you
cant go on,
without you......
without you......
Then a killer jam with tons of solo. Yeahya!! I wrote lyrics for the first time in a while!!!!
Harrroooooooooo!!!!! Its about my Bass Jordahl. Its a good bass.
